Anger can be a good thing. But it can be the worst thing too.
A certain amount of anger, therefore, is necessary to our survival. People use a variety of both conscious and unconscious processes to deal with their angry feelings. The three main approaches are expressing, suppressing, and calming. Unexpressed anger can create other problems. It can lead to pathological expressions of anger, such as passive-aggressive behavior (getting back at people indirectly, without telling them why, rather than confronting them head-on or a personality that seems perpetually cynical and hostile. People who are constantly putting others down, criticizing everything, and making cynical comments haven't learned how to constructively express their anger.
Recognizing Anger in Yourself and Others
There are often both physical and emotional symptoms to anger and, by recognizing these, you are more likely to be able to control them.
Possible Physical Signs of Anger:
● Frequent rubbing of the face.
● Tightly clasping one hand with the other, or making clenched fists.
● Clenching of the jaw or grinding teeth.
● Shallow breathing and/or breathlessness.
● Increased heart-rate.
● Perspiring, sweaty palms.
● Trembling or shaking lips, hands.
● Rocking motion whilst sitting.
● Pacing.
● Being rude and losing the sense of humor.
● Talking louder.
● Increased cravings for tobacco, sugar, alcohol, drugs, comfort food, etc.
Possible Emotional Symptoms of Anger
● A desire to ‘run away from the situation.
● Irritation.
● Feeling sad or depressed.
● Feeling guilty or resentful.
● Anxiety, feeling anxious can manifest in many different ways.
● A feeling or desire to lash out verbally or physically.
Anger can make you Sick
When we are angry, our bodies release the hormones adrenaline and cortisol, the same hormones released when we encounter stress. As a result of these releases in hormones our blood pressure, pulse, body temperature, and breathing rate may increase, sometimes to potentially dangerous levels. This natural chemical reaction is designed to give us an instant boost of energy and power and is often referred to as the 'fight or flight' reaction. This means that the body and mind prepare for a fight or for running away from danger.
Strategies to control Anger
Some simple steps you can try:
● Breathe deeply, from your diaphragm; breathing from your chest won't relax you. Picture your breath coming up from your "gut."
● Slowly repeat a calm word or phrase such as "relax," "take it easy." Repeat it to yourself while breathing deeply.
● Use imagery; visualize a relaxing experience, from either your memory or your imagination.
● Nonstrenuous, slow yoga-like exercises can relax your muscles and make you feel much calmer.
Practice these techniques daily. Learn to use them automatically when you're in a tense situation.
